G - Spot Week One
Power Rankings:
#1: East Bound and Down
Looking dominate in their first appearance in the Lighthouse. We have to raise the question whether or not they are using performance enhancing drugs. If all goes well for EBD and their pitcher, he'll qualify for the league scooter and a tryout for No Dead Weight.
#2: Roll Another Bunt
Expectations are HIGH this year as long as they remember to show up for the games. RAB sure did SMOKE BoF in their first appearance, but remember, we are only an EIGHTH through the season, and you do not want to use all of your STASH in the first game, or your whole season could be up in SMOKE.
#3: Team Death Pig
According to Urban Dictionary, a “death pig” is “a type of death metal which involves extreme pig noises.” This team scares the shit out of us. Don't be surprised if every theme week they show up with Insane Clown Possse make up. We're expecting every team just gives you the W this year out of pure fear.... we're cool, right?
#4: Smoosh Moosh Panthers
After a year hiatus of anger management and enhancing the lives of children in Tibet, the Panthers are back, with (albeit) a horrible new name. New faces, new strategies, however, the same cologne that works 60% of the time every time, we're anticipating this team to hold their own this season, while smelling better than their competition. If their third baseman's arm doesn't fall off they will have a decent chance at finishing .500 this season.
#5: Saved by the Ball
First crossover game of the year and unfortunately they were greeted by our friends over in the Superhero league. Whey protein and Muscle Milk proved too much as they met the all-star bunting league. Things are looking up for Week 2 as this team looks to rebound.
#6: Tinderellas
This teams got heart. Good work on the bar belt this week, but unfortunately they fell short to SMP in Week One. The scrappy team of crossfitters have definitely put there time in this off-season. I expect big things from them. Just don't use the bar belt as your weightlifting belt – hernias are expensive.
#7: Brews on First
BoF had all the makings to make some noise this season, but unfortunately came up against the juggernaut of RAB. This group of scrappy veterans has a chance to win some games this year, and we expect them to rebound after Week 1. Regardless, you can anticipate this team to out-drink you, which is a win in our book.
#8: Swamp Donkeys
This team is the definition of the Lighthouse League. SD came out with high spirit. After the blow up donkey took a wild pitch to the dome, the wheels “fell off the wagon.” Word on the street is the donkey has made a full recovery, and is anticipated to be present at Week 2. After hearing from a representative from the team who is vocally dedicating Weeek 2 to the injured donkey, we anticipate Swamp Donkeys to make some noise in Week 2.
#9: VIA Agency
Rumor has it they will not wash their shirts until they win a game. With their spirits, there's no telling how far this team can go. We've personally never been a fan of Tide (more of a Cheer person myself) so truth be told, I'm pulling for them. The Debbie Downys (get it?) of the league don't think so, but what do they know?
WEEK 2 PREDICTIONS:
EB&D vs TDP (Game of the Week)
Expect the “Death Pigs” to come out moshing, however, EB&D is flying high off their recent W. Expect this to be a future playoff picture. EB&D squeaks out a W in 5 innings 5-4. You heard it hear first.
VIA vs SMP: VIA is looking to find their identity in Week 2, however, SMP is looking to continue their winning ways. SMP with a convincing 6-2 victory.
SD vs SBTB: SD will come out with high emotion after hearing the positive news about the donkey's successful surgery, however, SBTB hates donkeys, especially the ones from the swamp. SBTB 3-1.
BoF vs. TD: TD has been in the gym all this week doing burpees and squat thrusts in preparation for Week 2, however, BoF has been pounding PBR since last Thursday's loss. Expect some fireworks in their Week 2 matchup – TD gets the W 5-4.
CROSSOVER GAME:
RDK vs. RAB: RAB is going to be placed a little outside their element having to bunt to get on base (but if you ain't cheatin' you ain't tryin', right???). RAB has been here before having played in the Superhero league last season. Expect a close game but RDK will prove why they love lightly tapping balls – RDK 5-3.
UPCOMING AWARDS:
Please submit summaries on each game – Unfortunately, I am way too obligated to drink during my game to analyze and critique yours. Please email your game summaries to mainegmot@gmail.com . Also, we will be doing bachelor/bachelorette of the week – please submit your most awkward players (pictures are encouraged).
Here's to a great Week 2.
Let's get weirder,
-The G-Spot
Power Rankings:
#1: East Bound and Down
Looking dominate in their first appearance in the Lighthouse. We have to raise the question whether or not they are using performance enhancing drugs. If all goes well for EBD and their pitcher, he'll qualify for the league scooter and a tryout for No Dead Weight.
#2: Roll Another Bunt
Expectations are HIGH this year as long as they remember to show up for the games. RAB sure did SMOKE BoF in their first appearance, but remember, we are only an EIGHTH through the season, and you do not want to use all of your STASH in the first game, or your whole season could be up in SMOKE.
#3: Team Death Pig
According to Urban Dictionary, a “death pig” is “a type of death metal which involves extreme pig noises.” This team scares the shit out of us. Don't be surprised if every theme week they show up with Insane Clown Possse make up. We're expecting every team just gives you the W this year out of pure fear.... we're cool, right?
#4: Smoosh Moosh Panthers
After a year hiatus of anger management and enhancing the lives of children in Tibet, the Panthers are back, with (albeit) a horrible new name. New faces, new strategies, however, the same cologne that works 60% of the time every time, we're anticipating this team to hold their own this season, while smelling better than their competition. If their third baseman's arm doesn't fall off they will have a decent chance at finishing .500 this season.
#5: Saved by the Ball
First crossover game of the year and unfortunately they were greeted by our friends over in the Superhero league. Whey protein and Muscle Milk proved too much as they met the all-star bunting league. Things are looking up for Week 2 as this team looks to rebound.
#6: Tinderellas
This teams got heart. Good work on the bar belt this week, but unfortunately they fell short to SMP in Week One. The scrappy team of crossfitters have definitely put there time in this off-season. I expect big things from them. Just don't use the bar belt as your weightlifting belt – hernias are expensive.
#7: Brews on First
BoF had all the makings to make some noise this season, but unfortunately came up against the juggernaut of RAB. This group of scrappy veterans has a chance to win some games this year, and we expect them to rebound after Week 1. Regardless, you can anticipate this team to out-drink you, which is a win in our book.
#8: Swamp Donkeys
This team is the definition of the Lighthouse League. SD came out with high spirit. After the blow up donkey took a wild pitch to the dome, the wheels “fell off the wagon.” Word on the street is the donkey has made a full recovery, and is anticipated to be present at Week 2. After hearing from a representative from the team who is vocally dedicating Weeek 2 to the injured donkey, we anticipate Swamp Donkeys to make some noise in Week 2.
#9: VIA Agency
Rumor has it they will not wash their shirts until they win a game. With their spirits, there's no telling how far this team can go. We've personally never been a fan of Tide (more of a Cheer person myself) so truth be told, I'm pulling for them. The Debbie Downys (get it?) of the league don't think so, but what do they know?
WEEK 2 PREDICTIONS:
EB&D vs TDP (Game of the Week)
Expect the “Death Pigs” to come out moshing, however, EB&D is flying high off their recent W. Expect this to be a future playoff picture. EB&D squeaks out a W in 5 innings 5-4. You heard it hear first.
VIA vs SMP: VIA is looking to find their identity in Week 2, however, SMP is looking to continue their winning ways. SMP with a convincing 6-2 victory.
SD vs SBTB: SD will come out with high emotion after hearing the positive news about the donkey's successful surgery, however, SBTB hates donkeys, especially the ones from the swamp. SBTB 3-1.
BoF vs. TD: TD has been in the gym all this week doing burpees and squat thrusts in preparation for Week 2, however, BoF has been pounding PBR since last Thursday's loss. Expect some fireworks in their Week 2 matchup – TD gets the W 5-4.
CROSSOVER GAME:
RDK vs. RAB: RAB is going to be placed a little outside their element having to bunt to get on base (but if you ain't cheatin' you ain't tryin', right???). RAB has been here before having played in the Superhero league last season. Expect a close game but RDK will prove why they love lightly tapping balls – RDK 5-3.
UPCOMING AWARDS:
Please submit summaries on each game – Unfortunately, I am way too obligated to drink during my game to analyze and critique yours. Please email your game summaries to mainegmot@gmail.com . Also, we will be doing bachelor/bachelorette of the week – please submit your most awkward players (pictures are encouraged).
Here's to a great Week 2.
Let's get weirder,
-The G-Spot
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