Lighthouse Week 6!

Welcome to Week 6.

This is the time of the season to look at how far your team has come, or in the Misfits and We Only Come From Behind's cases, ask what went wrong. By now, the great teams are playing out playoff seed scenarios, while the greatest teams are planning which brand of champagne to pop after the championship game. For a select few of you, the champagne bottles will become a reality, but most of you will only get to watch. Just enjoy the fact that all teams make the playoffs, so at least you can tell your mother that much, and with that, I'll let Hop lead us into the recaps...

Fuck Recaps. If everyone wasn't using people dying for freedom as a chance to go on a 4 day bender than they aren't true Americans. Tinderellas beat Ball Busters in a close game 3-1. The game was about as exciting as AIDS (sorry to any of you that have it!). The Tindies continue their dominance. 

Misfits played We've Got the Runs and lost 5-3. We've Got the Runs were down a bunch of players due to bowel movement problems (hence the team name) and the MisFits still couldn't seal the deal. We are starting to wonder if they are concerned about winning, or just glad it's past week 5 and they can start getting intimate with each other thanks to Mike Websters Permission. Hopefully they can relieve some tension and focus on the game from here on out.

Brilliant work Hopper.

The S3XT Panthers beat the Swamp Donkeys in a closely contested 2-1 match. The Panthers pushed two across the plate early which proved enough. In a game that featured zero excitement and not nearly enough drinking, the Panthers look poised to make another run at the championship.

The EX Panthers beat We Only Come From Behind 5-0, which really comes as no surprise to anyone. Even when WOCFB plays against a team with zero wins, they still manage not to win. A big flaw in WOCFB's strategy came when they recruited homeless people on Marginal Way to play for them this season, people who are more interested in picking up the field's empty beer cans than actually caring about kickball. 

And now for the predictions. Take it away CHopper.

Tinderellas vs. S3XT Panthers

This is a battle of David V Goliath, The Little Engine V. The Hill, Ali V Fraser, Our Drinking Habits V Our Income. This showdown is easily the game of the season, and the game of the week. The Undefeated Tindies get the rebuttal they have been waiting for since the championship game of Fall 13. We expect this game to go down to the final innings in an epic battle of defenses. Both teams are good but the team that shows up and scores more runs on Thursday will be the winner. Vegas currently has the over/under at 3 for the amount of fights that happen on the field. Hopefully James "beard baby" Moore can keep this game under control so it reaches its full potential. Tindies 4-2.

Actually, I see it another way. This game will feature two of the most overhyped teams to ever grace the Lighthouse league, one because of their public display of intoxication and obnoxious self-promotion on social networking sites (Tinderellas) and the other... well... because they earned it (S3XT Panthers - the Fall 2013 Champions). These two teams met last season in the championship game, and finally get an opportunity to play again, but unfortunately for the Tinderellas, if we learned anything in our 7th grade Social Studies class, it's that history repeats itself. I do agree with my colleague Hopper in that both teams are great on defense, and also agree with his expert analysis that the team that scores more runs will win the game, but the outcome could not be further off. I see the Panthers striking early with the Tinderellas tying it up in the latter innings, followed by a heart-breaking game-winning run scored by the Panthers, eerily reminiscent of last season's championship game. S3XT Panthers 4-3.

We've Got the Runs vs. Ex Panthers

Although WGTR won their game last week, we see a different story in the works this Thursday. Josh Moody has been literally whipping players for errors last week even though they won 5-0, so we expect the abused squad to be on their toes and too scared to screw up. Nobody wants step dad to get angry again. Although Team Dad Kevin Bailey makes his return for WGTR, his presence means nothing. Kevin is a lover not a fighter and we expect his mid inning team massage routine to get in the way of the focus of the game. EP Wins 5-2 off of runs scored by centerfield and second base screwups.

Ball Busters vs We Only Come From Behind

The Ball Busters are coming off a tough loss last week against a Tinderella squad that is running on all cycles (roids), however, get a gift this week in WOCFB. WOCFB seems more interested in picking daffodils rather than playing the field and has not won a single game all season. I would say they can turn things around this week, however, they looked terrible against an EX Panther team last week. Ball Busters win easily, 5-0.

Misfits vs Swamp Donkeys

The Swamp Donkeys will have an easy time against a Misfit squad that only appears to be getting worse. The Tinderella AAA-team has yet to figure out the game, and unfortunately are matched up against a veteran Donkey team that has looked strong against the S3XT Panthers and Tinderellas. TheDonkeys should have a field day against the confused Crossfitters and walk away with the W, 4-1.

That's all this week Lighthousers. Thanks for reading and we hope to see you all at the old watering hole, Dewey's, throwing popcorn in the Tinderella's beers and watching Bez puke in the urinals.

-GSPOT-